Let the Bodies Hit the Floor: Bye, E.D.:


Here's a double whammy situation you never wanna be in if your job is to get people to hate other people: the economy is so deep in the shitter that the only thing left to do is to dive into the sewer and salvage what you can, and the ideological movement you've been using to earn your keep by, as previously mentioned, creating more hate in the world, is at an end. At that point, as employees have learned at James Dobson's Focus on the Family (motto: "You know, Jesus didn't have benefits or a salary either"), you better be so important that your company can't survive without you.

And E.D. Hill, one of the longtime Fox "news" blondes in jackboots who would smack you with a Bible and smirk at you like she was letting you watch her satisfy her coochie with a dildo model of Rupert Murdoch's cock, lost her value like a Bear Stearns retirement account. No longer Doocy-worthy for the morning show, Fox and Friends, and post-"terrorist fist jab," Hill's contract won't be renewed. Let the purging of the nutzoids begin.

Here's just a random sampling of the recent idiocy spewed by the many personalities of this obviously brain-damaged and/or deeply disturbed woman (which is, after all, the primary qualification for working at Fox "news"):

Regarding media attention to Walter Reed Hospital's conditions, concerned E.D.: "You know, as some bringing up right away, it's Hurricane Katrina, it's this, it's that, instead of - look, there - there is a - a section there that is dilapidated; it needs to be brought up to - to standard. There are - there are treatments that are going - that are being - you know, taking too long to get to." (March 10, 2007)

Regarding what Hillary Clinton would have to do to defeat Barack Obama, passive-aggressive E.D.: "she has to paint him as being exactly what he says he is not. That he is a far left extremist. That he is not a unifier. And that he cannot go in there and get anything done in Congress -- in Washington because he hasn't been able to pass through legislation while he's been there. Does that work?" (April 16, 2008)

Regarding parenting advice from Zell Miller, E.D. the teacher (this is a long one, but because of the confluence of bugfuck and batshit insanity, it deserves the space): "Say, Senator Zell Miller, for example, as he is growing up, his mom tells him, Zell, if you want your dessert, you have got to eat your spinach. Didn't matter what she was talking about, if you want desert, you've got to eat your spinach. And what that means is, you know, we all want the good stuff in life. We want the big job, we want the great relationship, but are we willing to do the things we need to do to get there? Or do we just expect it to be given to us, without talking the smaller jobs, without, you know, working hard? If you want to go to a great college, you have got to study hard. If you want a great, love-of-your-life relationship, you have got to work at it. And so that was the whole moral there of that story, was if you want your dessert, you have got to eat the spinach." (November 3, 2005)

Finally, regarding immigration, "I think I'm smart" E.D.: "If, Bob, if we were to go, if America were to go into Mexico illegally and demand the rights every Mexican resident has, would they get it?" (July 8, 2008)

Oh, E.D. Pack up your whip and your crucifix. It's time to move on.