Message to the President: We're Not That Stupid:
Yesterday, the President of the United States treated each one of us as if we were the first passengers for pick up by the short bus. To be sure, we are a nation of idiots, as witnessed by our 2004 election and by the fact that still nearly half of recently polled Americans believe Saddam Hussein had something to do with 9/11. Or by the fact that anyone gives a happy monkey fuck over whether or not Suri Cruise is normal or some horrible genetic mutant spawn of the Cocktail guy and the Dawson's Creek chick. But generally leaders try to flatter the stupid - it's why, for instance, a politician can go to the biggest shit farm in Anal Rape, Arkansas and praise the noble shit farmer for his abilities at harvesting shit.

Not George Bush, though. He's a man who is unafraid to act like every American is a knuckle-dragging, drooling, eyes-too-close mongoloid. Perhaps it's the only way he can feel superior. Yesterday, when Bush gave one of his endless speeches on terrorism, his analogies and comparisons were so over the top, so hysterical (in the arm-waving, spit-flying sense of the word), so bloodlust-instilling calculated, that he may as well have taken out a bunny, shot it onstage, and said, "See? This is what terrorists wanna do," wiping bunny brains off his lectern and tossing the headless carcass into the gathered members of the Military Officers Association of America.

It wasn't just that Bush made the idiotic comparisons between Muslim extremism and Soviet Communism and Nazism. Those are easily dismissed: ummm, big fuckin' armies with entire crazed nations backin' them versus a bunch of horny guys shitting in caves. It was the strange way that Bush relished throwing the words of terrorists and extremists at us, as if we didn't know that these were pissed off, violent people. Here's Bush quoting Osama Bin Laden: "Death is better than living on this Earth with the unbelievers among us." Christ, it sounds like the journals of punk ass Klebold/Harris wannabes, like Osama's been listening to a little too much Danish death metal. This is our great foe?

The point here is that by Bush, Cheney, Rumsfeld, and others making their pedantic Nazi/Commie/Jihadi comparisons, they have succeeded in elevating the status of Bin Laden and other terrorists to epic proportions. Motherfucking Nazis could have taken over the entire continent of Europe, for real. Motherfucking USSR could have blown up the world, for real. Jihadis are living in a fantasy world, a delusional state, so brain-fucked by Allah worship and poverty they actually believe they are something more than, in the grand goddamned scheme o' things, a nuisance. By even pretending that Bin Laden is Hitler-like in any way other than Jew-hatred is to take Frankenstein's monster and pump that grunting, green fucker up to King Kong size. See, it only took angry villagers with torches to get rid of Frankenstein's monster. It took the military to take out Kong. So, c'mon, a little friggin' perspective here. Just because Bush says, "This is the great ideological struggle of the 21st century -- and it is the calling of our generation," doesn't mean it is.

This doesn't even get into the desperate flailing about in trying to make Iraqi insurgents, the Iranian government, and al-Qaeda (and its spawn) into one big ball o' bearded eeeevil. Said Bush, "As we continue to fight al Qaeda and these Sunni extremists inspired by their radical ideology, we also face the threat posed by Shia extremists, who are learning from al Qaeda, increasing their assertiveness, and stepping up their threats." Holy conflation, Mr. President. And it gets even more mindboggling: "Like al Qaeda and the Sunni extremists, the Iranian regime has clear aims: They want to drive America out of the region, to destroy Israel, and to dominate the broader Middle East." As opposed to the United States, which wants to keep America in the region, destroy Iran, and dominate the broader Middle East.

Who the fuck is Bush talking to? Who doesn't want to stop terrorism other than the terrorists? Why do we need to be reminded that terrorists have goals, too? Goddamn, the Rude Pundit is so tired of being treated like he's a fool. And he's pretty damn sure that sentiment is spreading fast.