A Brief Observation On Bush's Brief Statement:

Here's how President Bush's ended his brief meeting with reporters yesterday at the Crawford Ranch, which began with his statement that he feels really, really bad about the whole tsunami tragedy. Some eunuch ball licker from the gathered reporters asked Bush if he had any New Year's resolutions. A compassionate man at that point might have said something about resolving to help the countries through this crisis. A wise man may have said he was going to reach out more to others who are across the political aisle. There's a million things he could have said. Instead, he decided to take a giant shit on the statement of sympathy he had just given: "I'll let you know. Already gave you a hint on one, which is my waistline. I'm trying to set an example."



So that's how the whole thing ended. The eyes of the world were on this appearance by our fearless leader, his absence the last 72 hours having been conspicuous in the way that the absence of a lost dog might make one feel whenever you look at the uneaten food in the dog bowl. And how does he end this little showing? By saying, "I've gotten fat." So, fuck you, all you millions of starving Sri Lankans, Indonesians, and others. The fattened President feels your pain. And, hey, take a hint from Georgie: he's settin' an example- a few days without food'll improve that waistline problem in no time.



On a different note of fattened Americans and the tsunami, thank fucking Christ that "Nike has no reports of casualties among its staff or those of its overseas suppliers and no news of major damage to facilities" in Indonesia. Nike expects only a "minimal impact" on its operations, 'cause, you know, if you don't give a shit if you pay your sweatshop workers a living wage, then why would you give a flying fuck if they have to travel to work over the rotting corpses of their friends and relatives. (Rude nod to reader Cynthia for the heads up - she also mentions that Fox "News" has already done a story on Nike interests in the region.)



Oh, and the Phuket Starbucks was damaged.



Yeah, Bush may want us to watch our waistlines, but when it comes to the bottom line? No silly natural disaster of unimaginable proportions and horror can ever get in its way.