Breitbart's Whore, James O'Keefe, Goes to Lousiana Again:
Goddamn, wannabe gotcha journalist James O'Keefe must know how to suck a dick. Way more hooker than pimp, O'Keefe must be able to lap Andrew Breitbart's mighty two-incher into a magnificent two-and-a-half inch erection and just go to town. The best part is that he's such an enthusiastic cock gobbler. O'Keefe rings up the Big Government blogger (and, really, that's what Breitbart is, nothing more, nothing less) and begs for another dose of Breitbart chowder. Seriously, this skeevy, ugly fucker could give porn stars lessons.

O'Keefe, whose entire career consists of a racist attack on an organization through a creatively edited video and an arrest for being a shitty actor, is now after the Census Bureau for paying people for a few extra minutes a day. O'Keefe had an undercover man with a camera, in this case Shaughn Adeleye, infiltrate a census office to discover the horrible truth that you can't handle.

As for the "scandal," there is a level of nitpicking here that'd make a hungry bonobo proud. It's as if O'Keefe is doing a report on restaurants that put the forks in the wrong order. But if you're gonna be a obsessive-compulsive perfectionist justice fighter, you better be perfect in how you present your story.

First off, get right at least the minimal fucking facts you're showing. Adeleye quotes one worker as saying, "As long as you don’t have any major felonies or your fingerprints don’t come back as jack the ripper, you’ll be fine." What census employee Billy actually says is, "The only concern that you need to have is that if your fingerprints were to go through and you come back as Jack the Ripper, you got a problem." Minor discrepancy, no? But it's enough to change the intent of the sentence. It's just sloppy, sloppy work, and that type of "error" happens throughout the story.

And a note to young people manipulating their footage to fit a sinister narrative where there is none: try to keep your computer's arrow cursor out of the video, like at minute 4:07. It just proves how much you're bending the plot.

What comes through in this story is that Shaughan Adeleye is an annoying, neurotic freak, the kind of paranoid employee who the supervisor must cringe at having to speak with. Sadly, though, in the course of working/filming 17-20 hours at the census bureau, all Adeleye was able to get was roughly 5 minutes of footage. It ends with a supposedly evil conversation where most of what is said is "unintelligible." In other words, there's so little going on that's even minutely scandalous that they have to use footage that is essentially unusable.

Oh, and the video is padded with scenes of Adeleye, O'Keefe hisself, and other overprivileged douchebags acting douchebaggy to hip-hop music. The Rude Pundit is not making that up.

Let's face it: there's waste in government, as there is in any job, especially office-related work. Three and a half hours in a week? Fuck, you can bet the average cubicle jockey spends at least that much time on solitaire or forwarding YouTube fail clips. Of course, we don't know what the truth is because James O'Keefe is a fucking glory-seeking liar who probably measures shit by how much coed tail he gets when he appears on Fox "news." The video is as doctored as Heidi Montag. (High five, anyone? High five?)

One other observation: this video was taken in Lafayette, Louisiana. It is O'Keefe's second piece about the census, the first taking place in New Jersey. It's also his second attack on Louisiana. Within a mile or so of the U.S. Census Bureau is BP America's field operations office in Lafayette. There's probably better uses of everyone's time and even tiny abilities.

But such truly noble things are not what Breitbart demands. Like many conservatives, Breitbart is attempting to discredit the census because of fears that urbanization will tilt the balance of representation, among other things. But, oh, O'Keefe. The finest kind of cum whore is the kind who'll do anything for a chance to show how much he loves a cock. And O'Keefe ain't about to give up such bounty for anything like "journalism."