Science, Jindal, Obama, Oysters: No One Is Winning in the Gulf Oil Gusher:
Louisiana Governor Bobby Jindal is a man obsessed. He sees sand berms rising from the seas like nurturing teats, like the oil now well into its third month of gushing into the Gulf will be used to slick up those dirt titties like they're stuffed in a bikini at Spring Break in South Padre Island. He also sees rock barriers like fortresses growing and defending the marshes and inland waters. The rocks will be barged down from Indiana quarries. Next step? Get some of those Canadian super-beavers down here to damn things up. Who doesn't love beavers in action?

And Jindal, who looks like Billy Bibbit from One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, had his press office release a statement when the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers said that the rock walls would do more harm than good: "No one can convince us that rocks in the water are more dangerous than oil. That is absolutely ridiculous. The only people who believe that are the bureaucrats in Washington, D.C. who can’t see the oil, smell the oil or touch the oil." In other words, science? We don't have to show you no stinking science. We know the rocks will work. We prayed about it. Or some such shit.

What's important is that Jindal project the image that he is acting. And nothing says "action" more than Dutch-approved sand berms being dug out of the eroding wetlands. (To be fair, when the Rude Pundit first heard the idea over a month ago, he said, "Why not?" Well, he was open to an answer to that question, unlike Jindal.) Jindal can say it's "bureaucrats" who are holding things up, but these bureaucrats happen to be civil engineers and geologists and other, you know, scientists, who understand a bit more about what dredging might do to the coast and aren't just waiting for a copy of Jindal's request in triplicate.

When Jindal requested 6000 National Guard troops to help in operations at the Gulf, do you think he had a plan ready to go? The request was approved. Jindal has deployed 1000 of them. And he lied about why he hadn't deployed them all yet, blaming Washington's bureaucracy when, in reality, it was Jindal's. Jindal is a little boy, railing at the teddy bear for the crimes of G.I. Joe.

Of course, this being one of the largest environmental disasters in history, no one gets out clean, not Jindal, not BP, and not the Obama administration, which has kept out independent marine researchers and others who are "begging" to be allowed to do basic measurements that would say how much oil has been leaked and at what rate. So, in this case, the federal government and BP are holding back the very scientists who might be able to come up with the safe ways of dealing with the oil.

Meanwhile, tar balls and oil have finally made their way into Lake Pontchartrain. One imagines that Jindal wishes that Tony Hayward was still around to draw fire.