Gingrich and D'Souza: "Fear the Secret African Obama":
The problem, you see, is that Barack Obama is not the kind of nigger they're used to, so they have to turn him into another kind of nigger. Obama just doesn't conform to what the right sees as the various kinds of American niggers they're used to either manipulating for their purposes or deriding as lazy/arrogant/violent ("uppity" sometimes sticks). And he certainly ain't the wannabes, the power-seeking blacks who align themselves with the right, like Michael Steele, like Clarence Thomas. No, all the attempts to turn Senator-Candidate-Nominee-President Obama into a regular ol' nigger just failed. So they have to turn him into another kind. They have to make him into the exotic nigger, the Hottentot, more attuned to the nature of the savage white-conquering Africans than to that of the Zip Coons and Jim Crows. For many on the far and not-so-far right, Obama is Othello, the black Muslim from faraway dark lands ready to fuck and strangle your white daughters.

Conservative cumrag Dinesh D'Souza makes the African connection explicitly clear in an article for Forbes that's so retarded, so racist, and so bizarre that the leather-clad corpse of the magazine's queer founder must want to shove a dildo up his son Steve's ass. In "How Obama Thinks," D'Souza, the type of madman we used to call "fucked in the head," posits that the foundation of Obama's approach to governance is anticolonialism. Specifically, the anticolonial uprisings in Africa. More specifically, Kenya.

And D'Souza has a motherfuckin' Rosetta Stone to prove this: a seven-page article written by Barack H. Obama, Senior, in the July 1965 issue of East Africa Journal. Now, you might read this and say, "Huh, looks like Daddy O is reasonably and specifically critiquing a Kenyan parliamentary document dealing with economic policy and things like land use, job training, and foreign investment." But, then again, you're not fucked in the head. You might not say, "President Obama, who knows his father's history very well, has never mentioned his father's article. Even more remarkably, there has been virtually no reporting on a document that seems directly relevant to what the junior Obama is doing in the White House," even if Politico did a big-ass story on it back in April 2008. Again, we're not talking about a manifesto. We're not talking about a book. We're talking about a small article that merely wants to clarify the definition of "African socialism."

When D'Souza writes, "Colonialism today is a dead issue. No one cares about it except the man in the White House. He is the last anticolonial," he's demonstrating a willful denial and misunderstanding about the long-term effects of colonialism. But because D'Souza, an Indian from Mumbai, has been made deranged by their beautiful whiteness and deeply desires to please his former colonial masters, he decides that the President, who just escalated the war in Afghanistan, is against such things. In fact, he pulls together many disparate strings in a frantic attempt to prove his theory, and he ends up seeming like another idiot who can't accept that Obama is just Obama, a centrist Democrat who is negotiating as polarized a political territory as any President has had to face in a generation or two. No, no, there must be some grand unifying theory that makes Obama who he is, and it's not enough that it might be satanic Marxism and latent Islam. No, it's gotta be nigger Marx at work. D'Souza actually writes that "the U.S. is being ruled according to the dreams of a Luo tribesman of the 1950s...[a] philandering, inebriated African socialist." Or, in other words, fear the nigger and his drunk nigger father because they want your white throats cut.

Why are the mad rantings of Dinesh D'Souza in any way significant? Because they were supported and echoed by Newt Gingrich this weekend, who said in an interview with the National Review that D'Souza's article offers "stunning insight" into the President. "What if [Obama] is so outside our comprehension, that only if you understand Kenyan, anti-colonial behavior, can you begin to piece together [his actions]? That is the most accurate, predictive model for his behavior," said the bloated reminder of the decadent overreach of a power-drunk Republican party. This is the man who is the intellectual heart of conservatism in this country.

(By the way, why "behavior"? Does Obama prefer roasted gazelle with lentils over steak and kidney pie?)

Isn't this convenient? One no longer has to argue about whether or not Obama was born in Kenya. One only has to say that he's turning the United States into Kenya. Now that's a scary-ass nigger.