In Brief: Scott Walker Is America's Asshole:
Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker's eyes have the glazed over look of a man who just jacked off to a Facebook album of your niece's fifth birthday party. Actually, that's not accurate because that assumes that Walker would try to hide his proclivities. Indeed, Walker seems more like the kind of guy who'd walk into that party with a Koch Industries dildo in his ass and tell everyone to watch while he yanked it to the musical chairs songs. God help the little girl who is in the last chair. For what else do you say about a governor whose official website has a press release titled "Walker Calls Democrat Legislators Back Into State." You got that? Not "Democratic," but the politicized, insulting "Democrat" as adjective. It's like getting a note from your boss on company stationery that calls you a "cocksucker."

In his pathetic "fireside chat" last night, Walker lied again and again to the people of his state. Not only did he not acknowledge that unions have agreed to the increases in contributions to benefit (because, if he did so, he'd have to say that the "bargaining" part of collective bargaining actually works), not only did he not mention the tax cuts he got in January, but he blamed the continuing uprising on "more and more protesters [who] come in from Nevada, Chicago and elsewhere." Why the fuck would he mention Nevada? To invoke Harry Reid? And Chicago? Well, that place is just filthy with Obama. What Walker is doing is degrading the real and actual thousands upon thousands of Wisconsinites who are marching and chanting and attempting to save their rights that they've had for half a century.

But, seriously, dude? If you're gonna start blaming outside agitators, are you gonna hire African mercenaries to fire on the crowds?

The nicest touch, though, was when Walker said he was going to start laying off state workers by the thousands if Democratic senators don't come back and let the Assembly rubber stamp his destruction of unions. "Failure to act on this budget repair bill means (at least) 15 hundred state employees will be laid off before the end of June," he threatened. "If there is no agreement by July 1st, another 5-6 thousand state workers -- as well as 5-6 thousand local government employees would be also laid off. But, there is a way to avoid these layoffs and other cuts. The 14 State Senators who are staying outside of Wisconsin as we speak can come home and do their job." He may as well have said that he's gonna start tossing the bodies of his hostages out of the state house.