Last Time: Buy the Book (and Doug Stanhope Pants the Media):
"Last day, motherfucker," the Rude Pundit's editor said on the phone this morning. "Can you do it?"

"I don't know, jerk-off," the Rude Pundit responded. "Times are hard. Books are becoming the unwanted stepchildren of the reading world. Let it roll and let's find out."

See, the Rude Pundit made a deal with OR Books. After they published The Rude Pundit's Almanack in 2011, which sold a few copies, he wanted to put out a new edition, with updates and new material, one that would make it stay relevant for the coming election, a 2012 Edition, if you will (even though roughly 75% of the stuff in the original edition has nothing to do with this year's presidential race). But OR Books didn't want to gamble without some advance sales.

So it all comes down to this: Pre-order The Rude Pundit's Almanack as an ebook for ten bucks or a paperback for $17. It includes new, never-blogged material like "Ten Ways Occupy Wall Street Can Kick Ass in 2012" and "Backlashing Again: How Racism and Sexism Became Cool Again."

If we sell enough, they'll publish. But the deadline is Tuesday for sales. Otherwise the sons of bitches at OR Books can it (and give you your money back, all of it, no questions asked).

So take five minutes today for the cause of making the thugs at OR Book regret they ever fucked with rude readers and order.

(And thanks to everyone who's ordered so far.)

Regularly scheduled rudeness will return tomorrow, but until then, enjoy this:

One of the Rude Pundit's favorite comedians is Doug Stanhope, who, more than anyone else these days, is a true heir to Lenny Bruce in his brutal ability to call out moral hypocrisy and bullshit. He's performing in England right now, and he got pissed off at Allison Pearson, a Daily Telegraph columnist who got all huffy about a nearly-completely paralyzed man who wants to be mercy killed. The columnist's attitude galled Stanhope, who responded on Twitter, which started a Twitter war, which led to another column by Pearson condemning Stanhope as an "internet troll" and comparing him to an asshole who posted racist tweets about a soccer player who had a heart attack on the field. This is just all background to the main event.

Stanhope's online response, addressed to Pearson, is fucking thrilling. It's funny, it's cutting, it's savage. And, in the last few paragraphs, it is a succinct and incredibly smart analysis of the death throes of traditional media:

"You don't even understand the concept of an internet troll. I stand up alone in front of people nightly, my exact location announced well in advance and speak my opinions openly and publicly. You sit hunched over a laptop with a finger-sandwich hanging out of your mouth, blurt out whatever inane, reckless pap you can generate and think that there will be no repercussions, save for your alleged 'flurry' of emails.

"You would never have the balls to stand up and speak directly to a public gathering of Telegraph readers. You are the troll, Allison Pearson. You've always been the trolls.

"This is the arrogance of a media that is beginning to realize that they no longer have a monopoly on public discourse. People like Allison Pearson are dipping their toes into the internet, into the medium that is quickly making them irrelevant and they are shivering at coldness of their own sudden vulnerability.

"It used to be that people like me were at your mercy, Al-Zebub Pearson. If I said something considered mean-spirited or off-color on stage, the papers could lambaste me in the press with impunity. Now the shoe is on the other foot as we, the people have columns and readers of our own. You wrote what I found to be loathsome, I gave you a bad review and all of a sudden the flurry of email you're getting isn't so pretty.

"You are a moribund Vaudeville act. And you can either sink with the ship or come into the future where you are gonna have to hear what people think in whatever language they choose to use. If you google my name or read the comments on any one of my YouTube clips, you'll find boatloads of comments that are far worse than any of the slings and arrows you or even Fabrice Muamba [the racist soccer fan] suffered. It's par for the course. And if anyone ever went to prison for even a minute because of the viciousness of their online attacks on me, I would campaign endlessly for their freedom."