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Republicans Love the Fetuses; the Women, Not So Much:
Oh, man, how Republicans and assorted right-wingers are concerned about the fetuses. "Don't let the fetuses get all abortified," say conservatives. "Dear lord, don't let the people have access to the abortifiers and make them womens keep them babies." So you get Ohio completely losing its shit over abortion. You get the motherfuckin' House of Representatives actually debating a bill outlawing a bunch of abortions, with one numbnuts from Texas saying that boy fetuses jack off and shouldn't be aborted so they can go on blowing loads inside their moms, pretty much a textbook definition of "motherfucker." We got to, got to, got to take tender lovin' care o' the fetuses.

But let's put aside abortion for a moment because, you know, there's real and actual people, some of 'em with fetuses inside 'em, who need care, too. On that front, the GOP and assorted right-wingers kinda don't give a holy fuck.

For instance, down in America's vestigial tail, Florida, Governor Rick "Spinnin' Eyes" Scott just happily signed into a law a bill that prevents local governments from enacting sick leave protection laws for workers. Why Disney World, which supported the bill, wants ill workers in Monsters, Inc costumes roaming EPCOT is a mystery. But it does seem to lead to a question: how can you profess to give a happy monkey fuck about the babies if you won't let their low-wage moms have a day off to stay with them if they're sick?

Now you'd think, though, that pregnant women would be sanctified since they are carrying the protected fetuses. Wouldn't a chick with child be like some combination of Mary, mother of Jesus, and that batshit crazy mom with, like, 20 kids on TLC? Yeah, well, funny thing: seems that conservatives don't want the fetuses aborted, but they don't give a shit about how the moms and their fetus cargo are treated otherwise.

At a Wal-Mart in Kansas - because, of course, it's a Wal-Mart in Kansas, which probably does most of its business in Sudafed and rifles - a pregnant woman was fired from her job for keeping a bottle of water with her, which she had because her doctor had told her to stay hydrated. Her story is a clusterfuck of bureaucracy and legal cruelty in which her pregnancy mattered not a whit when it came to enforcing the rules of the workplace.

As a report by the National Women's Law Center says, "[A]n employee who injures his back may be allowed to stop lifting anything heavier than 20 pounds," but if a doctor wants that for a pregnant woman, it's a problem. In another case, at United Parcel Service, a pregnant woman was refused when she said her doctor told her to only lift light things. Meanwhile, "UPS routinely gave light-duty work and limited lifting to other workers with medical conditions, 'such as high blood pressure, diabetes, vision or hearing problems, limb impairments, sleep apnea, and emotional problems.'" In other words, if you're morbidly obese, UPS would care more about your problems than if you're pregnant.

Currently, "only eight states — Alaska, California, Connecticut, Hawaii, Illinois, Louisiana, Maryland and Texas — have laws to protect pregnant women" against discrimination at the workplace.

But Republicans in other states, like Ohio and Kansas, as well as Congress, will waste shitloads of time "protecting" fetuses instead of protecting the women who exist, apparently, merely as their vessels.

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